The Dark Horse
an award-winning play
by Tom Smilack

CHARACTERS

SCENE I

A dark, smoke-filled room. Three party leaders enter and sit around a table where the Chairman already was sitting. The Chairman is smoking a cigar and there is a partly full glass at each seat. The Chairman has his arms crossed; the Senator leans his chair on its back legs, rocking, and spins a pen in his hand; the Governor leans forward; the Representative chews on a pencil.

Chairman: I assume you know why I've called you here, [Nodding to each one in turn as he names the newcomers.] Governor, Senator, Representative.

Governor, Senator, Representative: [nodding at Chairman.] Chairman.

Chairman: [Slamming his fist on the table] It's the second to last day of the convention and we still don't have a nominee!

Governor: [Leaning forward, rubbing his forehead] Why can't we just go with one of the frontrunners?

Chairman: [Angrily] We've been over this many times. There's no clear winner. They're all practically tied in delegates. We can't afford to split the party down the center.

Representative: [Raising a pencil, pointed up, to about the level of his face] But don't we run the risk of offending everyone if we choose someone else?

[Nobody seems to have heard him. He appears dejected.]

Governor: [Shortly] Let's just choose a popular congressman.

[Senator raises his eyebrows anticipatively. After "scandal" he lowers them again.]

Chairman: Like who? We need some sort of name recognition - someone people can get behind. But all the ones people have heard of are wrapped up in scandal...

Representative: [Again raising the pencil.] I'm not...

[Again nobody seems to have heard him. He becomes even more dejected.]

Chairman: [Continuing] Someone people can get behind... Gentlemen, you know we need to win this election.

Senator: [Leaning back in his chair] What about that new Senator from California? Björn something.

Chairman: [Raising his head up] Medved? [Excitedly] Yeah, he could work.

Governor: [Thankful that progress is being made] He was unknown until the election...

[Until "Let's do it," the exchange is rapid.]

Chairman: Which he won handily.

Governor: It was a practically landslide.

Chairman: The people loved him.

Governor: He dethroned the incumbent.

Chairman: He could have some momentum left over in California.

Governor: Let's do it.

Chairman: Well, if there are no objections, we'll pick him.

Senator: Fine by me.

Representative: [Raising the pencil, speaking louder than before] Well, I...

[Yet again nobody has heard him]

Chairman: [Smiling] Great! We'll make the announcement tomorrow morning.

Governor: [Also smiling] Excellent.

[The Governor and Chairman both push their chairs out and stand up. The Senator lets his chair fall forward and land with a thump, then he gets up. The Representative looks dejected and annoyed, but accepting, as if something similar has happened before. The first three walk out.]

Representative: [Putting his palm to his face and turning his head down.] Don't say I didn't warn you...

[Pause for several seconds; the Representative stands and exits, pulling the door behind him enough to make a very audible sound but not quite a slam.]

SCENE II

The next morning. A dorm room, messy, clothes everywhere, beer cans and pizza boxes on the floor. A bunk bed is in the back, stage left, unmade. There is a window to the back, center stage; the door is in the front, stage right; the chairs are stage left. Three college students are sitting on lawn chairs watching coverage of the national party convention on a large television. The television is a large frame stage left; all action on the television happens in stage left. There are a clock and calendar in the background. The calendar is flipped to August.

News Anchor: [On TV] We will now go live to a press conference at the national party convention where the presidential nominee will be introduced and give a speech.

Chairman: [On TV, eloquently] There comes a time... in the life of a nation... when the people want change, the people want hope, and the people want someone who can make these abstract ideas concrete... Today I present to you this man, presidential candidate Senator Björn Medved!

[Raucous applause]

Björn Medved: [The audience applauds at random intervals during the speech, for reasons unapparent.] Roar roar, roar roar roar, roar roar roar roar roar roar, roar roar roar. Roar roar roar roar, roar roar roar roar. Roar roar, and I am proud to accept the nomination of my party for the office of the president. Roar roar thank you, roar roar roar, and God bless America! [More applause. All sound from the TV fading out a bit.] I will now take any questions you have for me.

[Dennis picks up the remote and lowers the volume. On TV, Björn Medved points at members of the press and answers questions, but nothing is heard. The three students stare at the television for several seconds in silence.]

Dennis: He's... [Trailing off]

Mark: A bear.

Jeff: He's of the family Ursidae.

Dennis: Do they notice?

Jeff: It does not appear so.

[Dennis picks up the remote and changes the channel.]

Talk Show Host 1: [On TV, accent similar to Barbara Walters'] We're back to Good Morning, USA. Today we're going to talk about this new presidential candidate, Björn Medved. Who is he? Where did he come from? Is he the perfect candidate? Some think so.

[Dennis changes the channel.]

Talk Show Host 2: [On TV] Hello, and welcome to our show; we are your hosts. The topic of the day today is dark horse candidate Björn Medved. Could he really be the kick that America needs to get out of this rut? Well this talk show host, for one, says yes. What do you think?

Talk Show Host 3: [On TV] Oh definitely. I think he's perfect. He'll be the best president in years.

[Dennis turns off the television with the remote. He blinks a few times, exaggeratedly. More silence.]

Dennis: Should we... do something?

Jeff: I suppose that if we feel that he would not be a good president, then it's our civic responsibility to campaign against him.

Mark: Especially if nobody can tell he's a bear.

Dennis: Wow.

Mark: Yeah.

Jeff: Exactly.

[They lean back in their chairs and look at the ceiling.]

Dennis: [Looking forward again] Okay, so what do we do?

[The others bring their heads back down.]

Jeff: Student groups, mass calling, mailing.

Mark: [Rolling his eyes and looking off to the side.] We could put up signs along the highway.

Jeff: We should probably look into this in better depth before starting.

Mark: Yeah, okay. [He brings his hand to his chin, puts his elbow on the arm of the chair, and leans back.]

[They all start thinking.]

Dennis: [Breaking the silence] Will we be able to make a difference?

Jeff: [With a distinct air of pessimism.] That remains to be seen.

[They all stand and exit.]

SCENE III

The same dorm room as before. The clock and calendar now show that it is a night in November. Everything else is the same - the bed, chairs, beer cans, pizza boxes, clothes, and television.

[The three enter the room and begin conversing while they stand; Dennis is near the television.]

Jeff: Well, tonight's the night.

Dennis: Did we even do anything? Did we make a dent?

Mark: Not according to the polls.

Jeff: The people love him even more now than they did before.

[Silence]

Dennis: Well, let's watch.

[Dennis turns on the television; the three take the seats that they occupied in the previous scene.]

News Anchor: [On TV] The final results are just now coming in, although they will have no impact on the outcome of this election. Björn Medved, California Senator, a virtual nobody outside his home state until he became a dark horse candidate for president, has won the election in a landslide. Let's go to Medved's campaign headquarters to hear his victory speech.

Björn Medved: [On TV] Roar!

[Tremendous applause.]

Björn Medved: [On TV] Roar roar!

[More applause.]

Björn Medved: [On TV] Roar roar roar!

[Even more applause. Dennis puts his palm to his face; Mark drops his head down forward; Jeff drops his head back.]

Björn Medved: [On TV] Roar roar roar roar, roar roar roar, roar roar roar. Roar roar, I am proud to be the nation's first Bear-American president...

Dennis: [Hopeful] Maybe that will get them to notice?

[Björn Medved continues roaring. Every once in a while a shout comes through the television. The shouts begin to increase in frequency until a fight can be heard breaking out. Soon, helicopters can also be heard. Björn Medved's speech is cut off. The college students lean in, becoming more interested.]

News Anchor: [On TV] In a stunning revelation, it is now apparent that president elect Björn Medved is actually a bear. Fights have broken out at his campaign headquarters as supporters and staff now come to this realization. It appears that some sort of Bear Secret Service is being brought in to protect Medved.

[The college students look at each other then back to the television.]

News Anchor: [On TV] This just in: riots have broken out across the country in major cities protesting the president elect's recent revelation of his species. We now go live to one such riot in New York.

[The college students are becoming scared.]

News Anchor: [On TV] As you can see this is becoming very violent; there are power outages all over the city and people are starting to loot affected stores. We just have word that a Bear Police is attempting to quell the riots. Wha - what's this? Oh God! A bear in the studio! [Screams, as Bear Anchor walks in and attacks him. News Anchor falls behind desk and the screams trail off. Bear Anchor takes his place at the desk.]

Bear Anchor: [On TV] Roar roar, roar roar roar, [clears throat] and that's the news at 11. Thank you, and good roar.

[The college students look at each other, scared. A bear slowly rises in the window. The students' attention turns to it. When the bear has fully risen and the college students' eyes are transfixed on it, silence. Curtain.]

Copyright © 2008 Tom Smilack